Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize
