I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
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