all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
