My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
