I'm jealous of your bromance
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Randomize
