I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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