is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
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