ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Randomize
