Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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