How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
