Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
