I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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