happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
it's great music for shaving your balls
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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