I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
her facebook's as public as her vagina
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Randomize
