I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
Randomize
