I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Randomize
