Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
Randomize
