Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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