two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
