a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Randomize