We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Randomize
