Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Pooping to opera.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
