In the future we'll all be gay
Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I think I am morally bankrupt
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
Randomize
