Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Randomize
