Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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