:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Randomize
