Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
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