Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
