we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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