we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
