I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Randomize
