For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Randomize
