just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
I need water and some morals
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
