Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
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