if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
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