I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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