4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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