No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
The adults are the big ones right?
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize
