yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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