Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
