why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
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