Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize
