I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Randomize
