It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize
