Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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