He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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