I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
Randomize
