A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
