So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
