dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
